totally m.i.a.

i know i've been missing in action for a month and all. and i've probably lost all my readers.

things have just been crazy.

since returning from pittsburgh, i've been working from home/bread co. our new office location still isn't ready for occupation so we're the foudnation without a home.

and my bestest friend amanda got married this weekend. i was matron of honor. i've been doing a lot to help her with last minute wedding stuff. i drove up to iowa last wednesday to be her brain for the three days before the wedding. drove her everywhere. helped her decorate her cake. let her use my hotel room as a wedding holding tank until we could give things to the hotel for the reception. it was a good time. and i gave the most awsome toast. the best man said he was glad he didn't have to follow that. that education as an english major paid off.

now she's all married.

i have no clue where my summer went. yes i do. it went to detroit. then to iowa. then to pittsburgh. then to iowa. and now nina starts school the day after tomorrow.

not sure who all i've told - but nina is going to a new school this year. she was picked in a lottery for a charter school. she's pretty excited. it will be a new start. new friends. new opportunities for her education.

anyway. i'm sorry i've been m.i.a. it's just been too crazy. i'm hoping to return to a normal schedule soon so things will seem more normal.

and i'll try to annoy you all with my babbling again...

us transplant games - day 1

for those of you who don't know, i left this morning for the u.s. transplant games in pittsburgh. the day started with a flight on a tiny little plane that only sat 50 people. it was mostly smooth - bumpy on the landing and take off. but it was short and pretty painless and i think i kept the hyperventilating to a minimum....

there was only one seat on my side of the aisle so at least i didn't have to share or anything.

anyway - we're staying at the doubletree and it's a pretty nice hotel. gotta love anyplace that keeps tossing fresh baked cookies in your face when you go to the front desk. we ventured over to the strip district for lunch. we ate at this little place (name escaping me - i'll try to figure it out and get back to you) that had an outdoor balcony - very french quarterish. they have this lobster roll that is basically a giant roll that is like a roll slash garlic bread filled with lobster claw meat that has butter and garlic and nom nom nom nom. and they had excellent seasoned fries. it was sooooo good. and the area was cool. kinda the loop meets soulard meets the french quarter in new orleans. we didn't actually have lunch until 4 or so. and it kinda freaked us out that as 5 pm approached - all the stores were rolling up the street vending and locking up the doors. like the place tunned into a vampire haunt or something at 5:15.

most of the night was spent trying to figure out tomorrow - which is going to be the first real day of craziness. we have a hospitality suite for the team and we have to get all the shopping done for it and get it set up. then it's the cards/pirates game tomorrow night.

the real games start saturday with swimming and the opening ceremonies - which i'm told is quite the emotional experience. i can't wait to really get going.

we just finished dinner an hour ago - we ordered in pizza. it's now midnight and i'm totally exhausted. i've been told that dinner this late is the norm - so i'm sure my system is going to love that.

this is going to be quite the experience and i'm going to try to update every day - provided i don't colapse into my kingsize bed and sleep for a year.

i'm going to try to crash now. this will be my first stay in a hotel room by myself. i survived my first flight without jeff - so i think i'll manage this okay too...

nite nite.

i don't get it...

i just don't get gas (except after eating white castles - ba dum bum - but seriously) - i just don't get gas. i passed 4 gas stations on my way to work. one was $3.98. two were $3.94. one was $3.89.

guess where i stopped? and not just for my 64 oz diet mountain dew with cherry syrup fountain drink...

but can someone just make up their mind and be consistant?

*rocks gently repeating "make up your mind, make up your mind, make up your mind"*

i'm not dealing well with indicision and limbo in my life lately...

detroit zoo, doubles and singles, side trip on the way home, and all the stuff in between...

so last night we started bowling our doubles and singles events at about 7:30 (an hour late). six straight games, no break. no amount of gatorade and oj could keep my blood sugar up. doubles came first, and i bowled a 145, 178, 127. singles i bowled a 166, 129, and a 92. in my own defense - by the time we got to that 92 game - it was about 1:30 in the morning and all the steam was totally gone. i'm not placed very well in any of the events so i probably won't win prize money this year. but i did bet $40 in brackets and turned that $40 into $85 - so that was kinda cool at least...

anyway. we also went to the detroit zoo yestereday. big place.

and on our way home today we took a side trip to warren dunes state park to visit the beach and lake michigan ocean (as we always affectionately called it).

and then i have all these photos - which don't fit into any other categories.

i'm pooped. yesterday was a long day with a short night of sleep followed by a lot of time in the car where i dozed off several times - but didn't actually get any substantial sleep. i'm sore and stiff - between bowling my brains out and sitting in a car all day. i have to take a shower and get some sleep and then try to function at work tomorrow. plus - the cats are still waiting to have a word with me about leaving for four days - so i have to give them their face time...

night!

team event

in this evening's team event i bowled a 158, a 152 and a 100. series a 410. i guess i choked in that last game huh?

tomorrow we have doubles and singles. we start at 9:30 pm and it can take 4-6 hours to bowl all 6 games. gonna be one late night...

in the meantime, enjoy these pictures and these pictures.

and we're off...

leaving first thing friday morning for the women's national bowling tournament in exotic detroit. jealous?

stay tuned...

all in a day's work?

morning got off to a fine start.

everything went to pot at noon when our phones went dead. weren't sure what the problem was. turned out to be some miscommunication someplace about our office move next month. someone thought the phones were to transfer over june 16th - not july 16th.

left for lunch at 1. came back at two to discover four fire trucks, five police cars, to fire chief vans, 3 first response vehicles parked in front of our building. we pulled over to a lot where two of our coworkers also just happened to land on their way back from lunch. the guys working outside our building digging a trench for the sewer hit a gas line.

2:30 - get the all clear to go back inside. smells kinda funky but they assure us it's not dangerous. but we find out that we can send emails out - but nothing can be sent in to us due to problems in new york.

3:00 - the trench diggers start playing with paving the spot they dug. tar and gas fumes combined with something that smelled like paint thinner starts giving everyone headaches but the gas guys can't detect any harmful gases in our building.

3:30 - call for a ride home cause my stomach is turning and my head is starting to ache.

4:00 - go home. where i am now, and working on work things to make up for the time lost by not having phones, emails, or a building with breathable air...

happy monday!

i've corrupted my child

we spent 45 minutes tonite watching nkotb videos on youtube (btw - i'm liking their new video more and more!) she's placing nkotb on her list after the jonas brothers - but i think it's only to please me. she wants me to put in the movie and see if i can still do the dances - somehow i think i wanna skip that part...

but we did find this father daughter wedding dance video and it cracked us up. you have to get through the first 45 seconds to get to the funny part though...

i so happy!

7 am - watched new nkotb video on vh1. it wasn't as bad as i thought it might be - but they have come a long way from chasing the girls around the carnival and locking eyes across the tilt-o-whirl.

6 pm - come home from a long ass day at work to find happy happy nkotb tickets in the mail. life is good.

6:30 pm - nina finds this in the depths of her closet (where it landed after we moved - along with her teletubbies videos). i'm gonna sneak out of bed at 2 am one night this week and watch it....



oh jordan. i can totally overlook your lameass stint on the surreal life where you came off looking like a weirdo with that whole boxes in the doorway o.c.d. thing. just give me one quality rendition of i'll be loving you (forever) - high notes in tact. i'll forget it ever happened...

i am the proud owner...

of 2 tickets to see New Kids on the Block on November 10 at Scottrade Center.

Section 117 - Row GG - seats 1&2

that's the right stuff all right!

ever since i got my laptop

bailey hates it. she's jealous of it. she's been trying to find a way to get around it to her favorite place in the world - my lap.

she finally said "screw it" and found a way...

you have no idea how hard this makes it to play solitare...

there's still time!

visit my kidney walk page to learn more about how you can help in the fight against kidney disease!

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"....

welcome to a very special episode of "why you won't be my next american idol". i'm your very smart, talented, clairvoyant karen seacrest. i apologize for not getting this to you sooner - but i was celebrating the night away because i - for once - ACCURATELY PICKED DAVID COOK AS THE WINNER!!! yeah me!

honestly - i don't know what everyone is so suprised about. it seemed like a no brainer to me.

so - let's not beat around the bush. david archuletta - you won't be my next american idol for the following reasons:
1. you have no range. you can only sing the powerful ballads that people sing on telethons. every song you sing sounds exactly the same.
2. you may be young - but you are by no means hip or marketable.
3. your daddy spent too much time training you on stage presence - and not enough time training you to have a personality.
4. and because lindsey's husband is right and you do sound like vera di milo (performed by jim carrey on in living color) when you talk - and it's freaky!!!

and that means that DAVID COOK - YOU ARE MY NEXT AMERICAN IDOL! and nina already wants your first cd. so that's one cd sold...

and your from missouri - so that's a bonus. i will have to work on you being a royals fan though....

until next year - this is karen seacrest - out...

idol finale...

nina won't shut up about the jonas brothers. nick jonas is oh so dreamy...

and that archletta performace on "it's too late to pologise" sucked. i hate that song. anyone notice how he didn't even sing real words? just aaaahhhhs.

and i guess jordan sparks is feeling better...

edit - digging the jack black, ben stiller, robert downy, gladis knight thing way more than celine and elvis last year. lmao...

edit - george michael looks terrible. he looks like a george michael impersonator...

edit - and now we're waiting. you know - i appreciate george michael music more than i used too. but i couldn't watch him perform..

david cook's guitar hero was better than david archuletta. david wasn't even a sperm when that movie came out...

waiting. fluffy comments. can we just get to the results. wait - did simon just admit wrongness?? david cook must be winning because simon wouldn't take it back otherwise...

there's the envelope...

certified blah blah blah...

here we go.

winner

is

YES!!!!!!!!!!!

woot woot!

nkotb - nov. 10 at scottrade center!

idol thoughts...

round one. david cook. singing u2. still haven't found what i'm looking for. i always hated u2 back in the day. have a better appreciation for them now. this guy is such a rock star. i'd pay to see him concert. that was good. i liked that. vote for david cook!

wait, did randy just say that this is the duel of 2007??

edited to add.

round one. david archuletta. don't let the son go down on me. is his daddy aware that this was an elton john song? and it was performed with george michael?? i bet if they had let him backstage - he would have thrown a fit. this kid's a 50 year old man in a 17 year old body. i don't like him. he's dancing like he has to go potty.

round one winner. cook. clearly.

edited again. are the judges clearly on something. that wasn't unbelievable. or flawless. or the best he's done so far. ick. and simon's speaking bullshit. oh look. he's crying. BE A MAN ARCHULETTA!!!

edited AGAIN.

spelling "sun" - S-O-N in my archuletta commentary and then talking about his daddy - was totally an accidental freudian slip. i swear.

more editing.

round two - david cook rocked AGAIN. and the judges are on smack.

david archuletta sounds weird. aaaaaahhhhhhaahhhahhhhh. what is that?? he has no range. none. has he managed to successfully do an upbeat song all season? NO.

and that song kinda reminded me of "don't cry out loud" for some reason. ICK.

i'm going to add randy mentioning "singing the phone book" to my drinking game. he's used that about 30 times this season.

round 2 - VOTE FOR DAVID COOK. ARCHIE SUCKS!

editing again...

david cook. collective soul. i love this song. i literally have chills right now. how can you deny that this man has an abundance of talent? he's far more marketable. have we not learned anything from the success of daughtry? that was beautiful. now he's crying. aw. how sweet. at least that was an emotional performance. i FELT that. so his crying is justified.

paula's standing again. someone clue her to her seat please. and i think simon's a stupid head...

edit again.

okay - we had to take a break to go get nina from girl scouts. we're back with archuletta doing imagine. haven't we seen this before? he's kinda all over the place. and once again. totally not upbeat. this kid has zero range. he's not a pop star. he's a "very special episode telethon performance" performer. and his mouth is kinda shaped funny. and he has pig nostrils.

and i felt zero chills.

randy's on drugs. he was pointing in the wrong direction when he said the best singer in the season was right there. oh man. he's crying again. he has zero personality or originality. and have you seen the mayor of the town he comes from???

if david cook doesn't win - i'm losing faith in america...

bet you guys are wishing i never got this laptop...

VOTE FOR DAVID COOK!

if anyone needs me...

i'll be in morris, illinois...

nina's dance recital - hip hop

i wish i had got this yesterday - it was better then...

nina dance recital - tap

nina dance recital - ballet

nkotb reunion

so i watched one of the performances from the today show today. something about 30-35 year old women screaming like 13 year olds is kinda scary...

i'm still bitter about their lack of coming to st. louis....

and just out of curiousity...

is anyone still reading my babble? i know i let this thing go for awhile - but i'm back now. at an almost annoying state. but i feel like i'm talking to myself...

csi season finale

i saw that coming when i heard it was warrick's last episode. but that ending kinda turned my stomach. i found it very disturbing for some reason.

now i realize that there was a strike that disrupted the season and all - but i found this season to be, overall, quite diappointing. from the beginning. even before the strike. the conclusion to the sarah story. revisiting the child prodogy storyline. the green blood people. last week's episode with the comedy show (i bailed halfway through that one. and the warrick/mob storyline. all not their best stuff.

dear writers of csi - you better do a better job next season. i've been a faithful viewer for 8 seasons now. don't make me regret it by throwing it all away with a second bad season in a row...

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

welcome to why you won't be my next american idol. i'm your host - an almost perfectly punctual karen seacrest.

it's finally the time we've all been waiting for. the night where the prediction i made oh so many weeks ago has come to past. it is - the season - of the davids. but before we go there - we have business to address first....

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol" we say so long to someone who in all honestly shouldn't have been in the top three in the first place. that's right. hit the road syesha mercado. syesha - you won't be my next american idol because the cycle 9 winner of america's next top model was saleisha stowers. it's too easy to confuse the two of you. you kinda look a little alike. you both have that rihanna thing going on. and we don't even need to mention how similar your names are. you can't both win reality shows where the theme is finding the best "insert talent here" in america. it's just too weird!

so that leaves david. and david. i really hope david wins. david cook of course. he rocks. and he's from missouri. and there has yet to be any weird news hit about david cook. or his dad. and he's just plain better!

vote for david cook!!!!

until next week when we crown david cook the next american idol and i take the cake in my idol bracket by accurately predicting the winner for the first time - this is karen seacrest. out.

all i have to say is...

i would hate to be the cookie mom of this girl's troop! my car isn't big enough!

r.i.p. greg

this post in memory of greg koerner.

greg was a good man. he was always there whenever he was needed. a friend to everyone.

in the world of WU b-school - greg was olin.

rest in peace greg.

you will be missed. you will not be forgotten.

earthquakes

i will no longer complain about feeling the little quakes we continue to have since last month's bigger quake. what happened in china is horrible. and since the first 7.9 this morning, they have had a dozen aftershocks that were all more than 5.0 - one that was over 6.0.

our 2's, 3's, and 4's are nothing...

ps, i love you

last nite i watched ps i love you with hillary swank. it was pretty good. not as good as the book. but not horrible either.

anyway - i never realized how much hillary swank and jennifer garner looked alike!! it's almost freaky. especially when you compare the performances in ps i love you with catch and release. as a matter of fact, i was watching catch and release yesterday morning and when nina walked into the room last night, she thought it was the same movie i had watched earlier that day and wondered why i was watching it again...

irony can be defined...

by flipping channels and finding dora the explorer on the spanish channel. it was completely transplated into spanish. except for the parts were dora normally tries to teach the viewers simple spanish words and phrases - those parts were in english....

it's quite possible...

that i may never have to go down into the basement again. everything i need to do can now be done from my bed in my jammies...

jeff claims to be a laptop widow and bailey is jealous that she can't get to my lap to sit anymore.

now - if i can just figure out how to use my powers for good - and maybe get the laundry and dishes to do themselves...

day off...

i have the day off today.

there's tons of things i could be doing.

but this laptop stuff is just way too much fun. the tv's on. i've got some pizza. with pineapple. i didn't even have to get out of bed if i didn't want to.

now that i have my laptop and wireless access and i don't have to go to the cold basement to babble about nothing. isn't this cool???

now - you may remember that i was convinced i was going to be the next j.k. rowlings - all i needed was a laptop.

i suppose i should get going on that...

testing. testing. 123

i'm, like, totally sitting in front of my tv right now watching ugly betty.

charlie's water just broke. i don't like her. i hope they find a way to make her go away....

the return of "why you won't be my next american idol"!!!

So, bringing everyone up to speed – the following people won’t be my next American Idol for the following reasons.

Michael – you were robbed. I have to say it once every season. And even though I never thought you would win – or even make the final 2 – or maybe I did – I haven’t reviewed my bracket choices in awhile – you were still robbed. But since it’s my job to insert something witty at this point – you won’t be my next American Idol because it’s AMERICAN idol and not AUSSIE idol. Maybe you can get a second chance over there.

Kristy – you won’t be my next American idol because you appear to be perfect. Perhaps a little toooo perfect. I’m certain you have a flaw (other than being less than entertaining on stage). And one of these days, TMZ is going to find it.

Carley – you too were robbed. Again – I never thought you would win – but thought you would go farther. And since I’ve already used the “American not Irish” reasoning on Michael – you won’t be my next American Idol because that tattoo on your arm kinda looks like Amy Whinehouse. And they tried to make her go to rehab but she said no no no….

Brooke – you won’t be my next American Idol because I like just a little more edge to my idols. And you’re kinda folkish. And I’m not buying that you can’t play piano with your shoes on…

And finally, we have Jason Castro. Jason, you won’t be my next American Idol because after all these weeks I’m still not 100% certain that your awkwardness in just shy nervousness. Although I really hope it is. I just can’t help but wonder if there’s some “all natural herbal supplements” – if you know what I mean – contributing to that silly little grin and bad interviewing skills.

But my condolences to Lindsey on the loss of her Idol…

Coming to you live (and yet slightly prerecorded) on my new dell laptop, this is Karen Seacrest, promising to try and be a better Seacrest and saying “OUT” – just hopefully not for five weeks….

GoodSearch.com

The local NKF office has created an account with "GoodSearch.com". Good Search is a search engine (powered by yahoo). You select your charity (in our case "National Kidney Foundation (NKF) - Metro East and Eastern Missouri"). Then you use either the webpage or their toolbar option (like the popular google toolbar) to search for whatever floats your boat.

The NKF will earn a penny for every search conducted.

You can also shop there at any number of stores and a portion of your purchase will go to the NKF.

Now - if your anything like me, you and your google toolbar practically have an intimate relationship. So why not do some good with your searches and help the NKF at the same time! It's easy as google!

You'll see a little animated box on the right under my cartoon. Give it a shot!

nina's vault

floor routine

nina's gymnastic "meet"

nina particpated in a fake gymnastic meet this weekend. scores were given (though not accurately) and everyone received a medal.

here's video of her beam routine...

hold on to your hats!

i've just recieved a $104 child support payment.

the last payment was received in august and amounted to $50. that averages out to $5.50 a month.

all my financial problems are solved! (insert picture of me rolling my eyes here).

shaken - not stirred...

i feel like a martini...

and ever since this morning - i've been obsessed with the usgs webpage...

and i'm super glad we've had no activity since the 4.5 at 10:15 this morning...

hmm...

you know that the world is headed to a strange place when 2 of the top 18 stories on the fox news webpage involve you tube...

help me in the fight agaist kidney disease

visit my kidney walk page to see how you can help!

karen seacrest thanks you!

call me nuts...

but 20 years later - they still look good.

and when the tour is announced - i FULLY INTEND to buy tickets.

sing it with me now.

oh oh oh oh oh

oh oh oh oh

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

welcome to "why you won't be my next american idol". i'm your host. gimpy karen seacrest. workin 9 to 5. every day. and man - does it interfere with fun things like being karen seacrest. my pretty face doesn't seem to keep us in groceries and electricity...

it's been quite the exciting week in idol land...

ryan bumped into something and hurt his knee...

david cook is all stressed out and having blood pressure problems and has to go to the hospital and is trying to shrug it off as nothing. and it's not working either. watch the playback - he didn't look well on tuesday nite...

simon hated everyone but david archuletta - i suspect little david's daddy is paying simon bribes to be nice when no one is looking...

paula couldn't string together words into an understandable statement...

randy didn't say the word "pitch" quite as much as normal...

oh. and little ramen noodle malubay cried her little eyes out and packed her high wasted pants up and went home. ramen noodle - you won't be my next american idol because - wait. is that you? are you on the stage? cause i can't see you. wave your arms. oh you are. well, can you stand on a chair or something? you are standing on a chair? hmf. let me break out the binoculars. hold on. OH. there you are. i see you now. that tiny little thing that gets visually swallowed up by the big stage. it seems like the vast stage area intimidates you - making it really hard for people to be entertained by you. i can just imagine how hard it would be to see you inside the scottrade center from the nosebleed seats...

by the way - i'll bet you $.50 no one gets voted off next week...

this is karen seacrest. out.

THIS WEEK! on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

YEAH!!! karen seacrest has it together this week!!! it's amazing what a thursday night margarita can do...

this week on "why you won't be my next arerican idol" i get to do a dance of glee because i finally get to use the line that i wrote for chikieze the day he hit top 24! chikieze - you won't be my next american idol because every fool knows that if you are going to give yourself a stage name - you don't pick something that can SO VERY EASILY be confused with the word "cheezy!" and with that - i now dub you "chester chikieze - cause your the chikiezeiest!"

until next week when i just may get this out completely on time. karen seacrest saying - always on the rocks. always with salt. out.

i am the mighty beach house tiki god...

i love my new job. i really do. it makes me happy. it's really fullfilling. but man - for some reason - ever since i started - having at least one drink on the weekend has been a requirement. and i start craving that drink on tuesdays...

ps. penn was robbed on dancing with the stars tonite. there's no way he should have gone home before guttenberg or corolla...

last week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

so i am totally aware that i am in severe danger of losing my karen seacrest job. but at least i know i have that radio show and my spots on e! news to fall back on...

last week on "why you won't be my next american idol" we all danced a happy dance of glee at the departure of dear amanda overmeyer. amanda - you won't be my next american idol because i'm tired of looking at your armpits and your hair is so over processed that it looks like a wig. oh. and you stink. and what's even BETTER? you don't get to go on the tour either. na na na na na na.

i'm so mature.

so until - whenever i get around to updating again.

this is karen seacrest - in danger of cancellation - reminding you that bunnies who bring chocolate are your friends. out.

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

okay okay okay. i'm a horrible karen seacrest. and since i don't want to, once again, blame a hectic life style for being late - even if it is true - i'll just say that it took me seven days to recover from whatever the heck it was that kristy sang last week. as a die hard beatles fan - i think i experienced some painful palpitations...

and i heard a rumor that they are singing from the lennon/mccartney songbook again this week. i really hope it was just a rumor...

anyway - so david hernandez hit the bricks this week after a horrible, boy bandish rendition of "saw her standing there." david - you won't be my next american idol because when you say "i'll never dance with another" - i know that it has more to do with sharing the multitude of one dollar bills coming your way than it does with the girl standing in the corner. if you know what i mean (and i think you do - if you don't - google the scandal)....

so that's it. you waited all week for that. i'm sorry. i hope to do better this week (as i have to work NO mandatory extra hours and have NO MEETINGS this week!)...

until next week. karen seacrest. out....

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

this is karen seacrest coming to you - a little late due to hectic girl scout duties. you know - there's probably a seacrest joke there that simon would make - but i won't go there.

so since i'm about three days late with this - let's get onto it.

taking a ride on the "bye-bye" train this week was luke menard. luke - you won't be my next american idol because last week you slaughtered my favorite queen song. and you do these strange little poses when you sing that just scream "i'm an a'capella performer." i can't quite explain it. but it annoys me. and it doesn't go with the songs you sing. and you kinda remind me of luke perry - and he's so 1994...

also taking the limo ride home (but hopefully wearing underwear) is kady malloy. kady - you won't be my next american idol because hello? been there. done that. and look at the outcome. britney's a nutcase who's daddy is controling her finances, who's ex is supervising the kids, and who's baby sister has decided it was cool to be a poor example for young girls everywhere. do we really need to go through that AGAIN? perhaps you could give that "legands in concert" show a try. they have performances in both branson AND las vegas...

leaving us also is asia'h epperson. now karen seacrest doesn't agree with this coice either. especially since it means once again that amanda didn't go home. but asia'h - you won't be my next american idol because america seems to think that amanda deserves it more than you. isn't that sad??

and on an expecially sad note - we are saying good-bye to mr. sassy pants himself - danny noriega. i've taken a bit of grief in recent weeks because i liked sassy pants. sure - he was a diva. and a drama queen. and an attention whore. but he just reminds me of justin on ugly betty so much! and i love justin on ugly betty! but anyway - sassy pants - you won't be my next american idol because i find it freakish for a boy to have such a tiny hiney. it's weird.

so there you have it. the "oh so close but not quite close enough" final four rejects of the first half of live episodes.

on to the top twelve!

this is karen seacrest saying - it's time for a thin mint binge. out.

the poor good samaritan

i feel so bad for the family of this guy.

there was $5 in the tip jar. it probably didn't even cover the coffee that she bought as a diversion...

are you feeling - saucy???

One Semester of Spanish - Love Song
Uploaded by pocatinta

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

welcome to "why you won't be my next american idol." i'm your host - a very, very, VERY unhappy karen seacrest. how unhappy am i you ask? well - i'm 75% unhappy - that's how unhappy. because i am in 75% total disagreement with last night's departures.

who are these people and what the fruit loop is going through their minds when they are voting?? and if i personally catch any of you voting for that "amanda bride of frankenstein" - i am going to come to your office and beat you with a stick!

anyway - on with the show.

leaving us this week is branson's (even though his bio says texas) own jason yeager. jason, you won't be my next american idol because your blonde streak makes you resemble a unicorn. perhaps there's hope for you down the road and andy williams' moon river theater.

now i rant.

hitting the road next is alexandrea lushington. and even though she doesn't deserve it, alexandrea - you won't be my next american idol because your name is really alex-and-ri-a - not alex-and-ray-a. that just sounds funny. and short heeled boots and baggy shorts with bird legs doesn't look good. sorry toots. back home to granny you go. (watch out america - granny's comin after you with her cane!)

walking off stage with tears in her eyes is alaina whitaker. alaina - you won't be my next american idol because america clearly can't keep the blondes straight. they all thought they were voting for you but they were really voting for "brittney" malloy. i only wish you had stood your ground about singing after you got booted. i wouldn't have blamed you if you didn't sing...

finally, exiting stage right, is robbie carrico. robbie - you won't be my next american idol because your name isn't david, david, david, or michael. face the fact - it's the season of the david's. someone start making a statue. and michael - well - you can't have "the david" without michaelangelo. you do the math.

so that's that. because of these three exits - there are three people heading to the top twelve that won't deserve to be there. karen seacrest is mad at you america. i'm putting you on notice (mental note - see if i can work that out with stephen colbert). i hope you can live with that hanging over your heads.

until next week this is karen seacrest saying - watch your back. out.

sounds like a case for dr. drew

wouldn't it me nice to see spezio on vh1 for season 2 of dr. drew?? it would be the only way to save his image. if he goes to rehab again - no one's going to believe him. this way - they could see it happen. if it happens.

perhaps there could be a cardinal's episode of a&e's intervention??

moment of truth....

destroying families one contestant at a time....

sad state of the world...

it has officially been 6 months since i have received any child support.

in august i received a payment of $50. i guess i was supposed to stretch that out to cover 6 months time.

you tell me how i can keep food in her belly and clothes on her growing back and shoes on her enlarging feet at $8.34 a month...

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"

greetings. and welcome to the first 2008 episode of "this week on why you won't be my next american idol". as always, i'm your host, karen seacrest, coming to you live and via satellite from across hanley/big bend/what's left of highway 40....

first of all - let's give it up for that new paula abdul video. that was... um...

my mom said if i can't say anything nice - not to say it at all - so let's move on....

last night we said farewell to the first of the 2008 idol rejects. 4 down - 8 to go...

leaving us last night was garret haley. garret - you won't be my next american idol because you're too skinny. have a steak. and some fried chicken. and mashed potatoes. and gravy. and chocolate cake. for the benefit of mr. kite - please EAT SOMETHING!!!

also leaving us is amy davis. amy - you won't be my next american idol because america just wasn't given enough time to get to know you. nerves got the best of you. and if you're going to pull off patsy cline - you can't be nervous. poor patsy was probably rolling over in her grave at your lack of confidence.

hitting the road is also joanne borgella. joanne - i totally don't agree with the decision - but you won't be my next american idol because i'm sure that somewhere mandisa had a campaign going against you (that whole "if i didn't win - she can't either" jealousy thing.). you may not be my next american idol - but at least you still have the "2005 Miss F.A.T." title.

and finally, we say "pack your bags" to colton berry. colton - you won't be my next american idol because you never should have been in the top 24 in the first place. kyle should have been there and everyone knows it. and i'll never forgive you for taking his spot. never. oh. and your eyelashes are freakishly light. so take that kyle spot stealer.

so there you have it. the first four rejects and why they won't be my next american idol. until next time, this is karen seacrest. out.

i'm still alive - i promise...

so i know i've been super quiet for a week or more. i spent my week off between jobs running errands and sleeping.

then jeff gave me his cold. i'm still not happy with him about it.

i've started my new job and it's going great. i still have both of my kidneys. yeah me!

i can boast that i have my own printer inside my cubical. my cubical is twice the size of my old one. i can wear jeans on friday. and i have monday off for presidents day. eat your heart out WU! :-D

i have some comments on the top 24 idol contestants - but they will have to wait another day or so. i've simply been too tired at night to get on the computer.

i promise to bring the brain back to it's full glory soon!

last day

today is my last day at WU. craziness. it still doesn't feel real at all.

anyway - because i was asked - below is a link to the photos from my farewell party. don't look at me - i look terrible.

kristine - i shouldn't paste them here - i should tell you that you have to create your facebook account to see them. i'm far too nice. ;-)

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2080345&l=c69c1&id=3114655

farewell party...

so yesterday my coworkers threw me a farewell party. i had a nightmare last week that no one came - and when the snow started i was pretty upset thinking no one would come. but people came. lots of people. a few i didn't even know.

anyway - it was great. they got me a cake shaped like a kidney (which was really as sweet of a gesture as it is a gross concept). and there were WU parting gifts - items to use while traveling - a portfolio, umbrella, travel shampoo kit, and a book to track expenses. and there were silly gifts - 7 autographed squishy stress kidneys. and there was an eiffel tower. and smiley faces. and a memory book with sappy and funny messages. and a nice gift card to dress barn to buy new work clothes.

and there was a really nice speech made by my boss - i think it made mom and dad really proud to hear such wonderful things about me.

but the best was the poem my pal lindsey wrote for me and read to everyone after saying a bunch of really nice stuff about me.

i made her send it to me electronicly so that i could share it with my blogging community (all 3 or 4 of you). and to share it with the poopyhead who didn't come - and you know who you are - tph! ;-)

here it goes!

An Ode to Karen Meyer


Eight years ago, a young Fontbonne grad
Came to show A&D what she had.
Just she and her daughter and some years at Subway;
Karen Meis Meyer has come a long way.

We have seen her get married and change her name
Karen will not leave the same person as she came.
Karen is now 30 and Nina is 10!
Can you believe how long it has been?

Out of the Alumni House, to a new place she goes;
Who will answer the questions that no one else knows?
Who will sell us Girl Scout cookies and buy our Avon?
Will the American Idol bracket live on?

No one’s as familiar with the Golf Outing as she is.
No one else can approve IDs on FIS.
She has contributed so much, in big ways and small;
There is no way we could count it all.

We’re so proud of Karen, and excited for her,
But there will be a hole at workstation 3, for sure.
Karen will offer so much in her new career.
We have been so lucky to have her here.

Karen is creative, intelligent, generous, and fun.
We are so grateful as we look back at all she has done.
Karen, the Kidney Foundation is so lucky to have you;Best of luck in all that you do.

how bout that snow???

check out these lovely pics taken this morning from the warmth of my house....

http://wustl.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2080007&l=3fd2c&id=3114655

how not to make it to the hollywood round on american idol...

1. refer to past competition successes during your audition.
2. fall to your knees in a passionate display of your devotion to being the next american idol.
3. forget all of the lyrics.
4. act like a dodo head.
5. gift the judges gifts.
6. show off your gymnastic skills.
7. use any sort of harmonica or mouth horn. that's not singing.
8. wear any sort of gold lame (blogger doesn't allow accent marks - but i think it's no coincidence that it is spelled "L-A-M-E").
9. look like mortisha and elvira had a love child with marilyn manson.

i never realized...

how emotional it could be to leave a job. some days i'm excited. other days i'm really sad (today's a sad day - first day of the last full week). my stomach has been in knots for 2 weeks (but i've lost 6 pounds).

the days are flying by so fast and there's still so much to resolve. and i need to do a heavy duty desk cleaning.

last week i got through my emails. took half a day. and i deleted over 6300.

it really is quite a crazy feeling.

they're throwing me a party on thursday. i'm always a wall flower at those things. being the focus of one will feel so strange. i had a nightmare last week that no one came.

anywho. just a few thoughts on my frame of mind lately. i never thought it would feel like this...

how not to make it to the hollywood round on american idol...

1. wear clothes that don't fit you.
2. bring your spouse/significant other in to audtion with you as a duo (even though it worked for one - that was a rare exception). it's called "american IDOL" - not "american IDOLS".
3. fall to your knees as you sing passionately.
4. argue with the judges decision.
5. continue to argue with the judges decision.
6. sing whitney houston.

chchchch changes!

after 7 years, 11 months, and 28 days, i will be leaving my "current employer" to join the local chapter of the national kidney foundation.

my last day at WU will be feb. 5. my first day in the new digs will be feb. 13. it was supposed to be the 6th - but they had to change it because the bosses will be out of town and i can't start without them. so now i get 7 days off in between. which will be nice.

i got the offer monday. on monday i felt shock.

i put in my resignation and told my immediate coworkers on tuesday. on tuesday it felt surreal.

today - i think i was more buzy and frazzled than i've been in months. and i'm almost thinking "what did i do?"

it's a good opportunity. i get to go to pittsburg in july with the local team for the transplant games. that will be cool. i've never traveled for work before. oh. and every other friday during the summer they have "summer fridays" which means the office is closed. that's right. i'll have 3 day weekends every other week in the summer. sweet. and i get to do the newsletter - which will be cool. writing. :D and my favorite alum of WU told me to sign him up for a committee at my new job - he'll volunteer.

so. that's that. that's my big news. i'm waiting to wake up now...

oh - and see below for the first idol email of 2008...

how not to make it to the hollywood round on american idol...

1. refer to a former contestant during your audition.
2. sing a song made famous or recorded by a former contestant during your audition.
3. compare yourself to a former contestant during your audition.
4. sing "an original piece written by me" during your audition.
5. dedicate your song to a judge during your audition.
6. look like the rabbit ears on a 1982 12 inch black and white tv during your audition.
7. continue singing the same song after you know you've bombed, the judges said no, or your "original piece written by me" didn't pan out.
8. try to sing a new song after you know you've bombed, the judges said no, or your "original piece written by me" didn't pan out.
9. over dance live you've had one too many margaritas.

and finally

10. dress like princess leah unless you have the face and the bod to pull of that gold steel bikini with the chains.

news

i believe there is news on the horizon.

watch here for more information.

well NOW what do I do...

the fox 2 tabulater survey said i was supposed to vote for this guy - now what do i do????

randy of the redwoods is looking better and better....

it's all about the stuf...

conclusion? the more stuf you eat - the more stuf it takes to make you happy...

i'm actually quite biased in the direction if the Mr. Big Stuf Oreo - circa 1985-1991. the stufage there totally rocked more than stuf can say...

i have such fond memories of sitting in my grandparent's kitchen with my 300 calorie treat, eating the top cookie first, then using my finger to scrape every last bit of stuf off of the other cookie. and then feeling so completely ill that i had to toss the bottom cookie in the trash.

i tell you - those were the days. they should totally bring back the mr. big stuf. just don't tell anyone but the select few loyalists (aka - ME). this way - it can't be blamed for contributing to the growing (unintentional pun) population of obese adolesents in the country. i'm already fat - so it can't possibly make things any worse for me....

so.

happy new year. i know i'm a bit late. but i've just been busy and stuff.

not sure doing what. but i'm certain i've been busy doing something.

and i won't admit that it was watching brittney breakdown coverage. gotta love that showbiz tonight. and i've concluded that the hairstyle of the woman who has been filling in for nancy grace can be referred to as a mullet.

and how bout that new episode of colbert last nite? "which brings us tonight's word!" pause "and that's the word - we'll be right back."

due to a proposal in bars in st. charles - i wikipedia'd profanity today. interesting read. i don't think i've seen a certain four letter f word (not fart) used as an example so many times. i have decided that if the proposal goes through i will no longer be able to go to bars in st. charles as i have a strong tendency to dance on tables while screaming colorful poetry after i've participated in the nightly drinking contest. i'll just have to stick to jeff county where my talents are appreciated.

what? we don't go to bars in jeff county? what? i seldom go to bars anywhere? hmmm. wonder where that drinking contest was then....

anyway - a few countdowns for you.

23 hours until i have another reason to be nervous
4 days till cookies go on sale
5 days till i'm forced to sit through high school musical at the fox
7 days till idol starts and my blog gets funny again
10 days till the next three day weekend

i know this is gonna sound stupid

but i can't seem to figure out why it is when someone famous is murdered - it's called an assassination. but when joe blow down the street is killed because someone doesn't like him - it's just called murder.

i looked on wikipedia - cause if it's on wikipedia it must be true. hence wikiality. but that's not important.

wikipedia says that assassination is "the murder of a public figure. An added distinction, among assassination and other forms of killing is that the assassin has an ideological or political motivation, though many assassins (especially those not part of an organization) also demonstrate insanity; other motivations are money (contract killing), revenge, or a military operation."

i know that defines the word specifically as the murder of a public figure. i kinda wonder about the etymology of the word - but not enough to research it. but i don't get why we need a word to distinguish between the two.

it seems to me that when joe blow down the road was shot and killed for the $50 in his back pocket or because he was getting it on with someone else's woman - that he's just as dead as mr. super joe blow in hollywood, new york, or d.c. i don't think mr. super joe blow's murder is any more special than regular joe blow's murder. they're both dead at the hands of someone else.

to me it would seem that to call some one's murder an "assassination" makes it sound like it is more important, special, notable, and tragic than anyone else's murder. and something about that just doesn't seem right to me.

and now i'm thinking in circles. it's quite dizzying.

i should go back to writing about celebrities and reality tv. lucky for me that idol starts in a couple of weeks!

hmmm

according to this, my presidential match is democratic NM governor bill richardson.

interesting - i so wasn't heading his direction that i don't think i even have a clue who he is....

all i got for christmas is....

• 2 fleece throw blankies
• 1 box of colored pencils that i think were really intended for nina
• 1 helly kitty/hello christmas book + subscription to light and tasty
• 1 additional are you smarter than a fifth grader game (which santa brought nina)
• 1 pair of pj's
• 1 gwen stefani l.a.m.b. perfume gift set
• 1 kelly clarkson cd - my december
• 1 copy of Stephen Colbert's "I am America (and So Can You!)
• 1 $15 starbucks gift card
• 1 card with $50 that i have to share with jeff
• 1 set of spiffy knives like rachel ray and alton brown use.
• 1 grater thingie that has some professional name but we call a grater thingie
• 1 necklace
• 1 calendar - hand made by nina
• 1 large bath sheet towel - jeff got one that matches
• 3 plastic tumbler glasses with cats on them
• 2 beanie baby gingerbread boys - one boy - one girl
• 1 t-shirt from pensicola
• 1 battery operated candle glowy thingie
• 2 ornaments - one gingerbread - one new orleans mask/jester
• 1 chocolate gingerbread boy
• 1 letter from the eastern missouri bankruptcy court notifying me that the sperm donor had filed for chapter 7 bankruptcy and that i was listed as creditor because he still owes me over $16,000 and that i might want to contact a lawyer to make sure my rights were protected
• 1 pair of gingerbread boy socks
• 1 coffee mug with hot cocoa
• 1 losing scratchers ticket
• 2 tickets to see wicked at the fox on january 1

the politically correct christmas story...

i got a kick out of this piece from stltoday...

bad idea...

reports are saying that nick is considering doing a special on teenage pregnancy in light of the jaime lynn controversy.

i think it's a bad idea.

i am by no means a hypocrit. i had a kid out of wedlock. being a single mom is hard. i've been there.

i sat and watched the jaime lynn enhanced episode of showbiz tonight on cnn last nite and they were flying from all angles.

"she should be commended for not getting an abortion and stepping up to the plate."

yeah yeah yeah. she doesn't deserve a medal because she said she's keeping the baby. she should get one if she actually sticks to her word and tries to give the kid a normal life. not the hollywood kid life. but a normal life. without nannies or personal assistants or a pr agency to smooth things over.

"being a single mom is so hard - especially for a teenager!"

sure. talk to you me when you don't have a trust fund, hit tv show, cd, or deal with ok mag to sell your photos after the baby's born for several million dollars. try it with a savings account with $300 and no job or insurance. have to deal with the system. medicaid. child support. talk to me then.

"her career is over" "why can't she be a teenage mom and have a career too?"

she can have a career. i just don't think it should be this one. nina can no longer watch zoey 101. when i told her why - all she said was "she's too young to have a baby." she's a horrible example for little girls. "do as i say - not as i do."

i think that if nick goes ahead with this special to try and smooth over the crisis at hand - it's going to glamorize the whole concept of teenage pregnancy. ok has a deal for the first pictures of jaime and baby. jaime lynn isn't going to have a tough go of it. not at all. little girls have been looking up to her and now they're going to see what she did as being cool. having a baby is going to be a fun adventure for her. not the struggle that it really is for the single young mom. no matter how the publicists try to spin it.

nick can't fire her for being pregnant unless her contract has something in it about morals - which i doubt. but they can pull they show for bad ratings. and i have a feeling that they will be going down.

maybe i'm wrong. it's possible. i just can't see it as anything but a bad thing. the ok deal. the possible nick special. using jaime lynn as an example. all it will show is how much fun she's having - not the dirty nitty gritty of it all.

use a real situation as an example. not a piece of pr being spun by the master manipulators of truth in hollywood...

i am so depressed.

as of 4:10 pm central time today - nina will be 10....

oh - and how bout that jaime lynn spears?

ya'll remember...

ya'll remember (goin all britney spears on ya with my ya'lls now) back in the summer i gave ya'll a link to youtube for my intern who was trying to become an youtube star with their youtube series "chris n chair"?

well - the first full episode is finally available. doug tells me it's about 18 minutes long - so only watch when you have time...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYs4yT6fDxk

here's the link to part 2 of the first episode....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdrGW9v3JBQ

csi

nicki was buried alive.
brass was shot and almost died.
katherine had her daughter abducted and father shot to death in front of her eyes.
greg got the crap kicked out of him.
sara was abducted, trapped under a car, almost drowned in a desert rain storm and flash flood, and nearly died from dehydration and exaustion while trying to walk to safety.

now warrick is being accused of murdering a stripper and leaving her in his own car (now how dumb would he have to be to do THAT anyway - get real) while on a massive trip from combining perscription pharmacuticals.

is no one on the cast safe?

we've decided that grissom is the only one left - and we suspect that when they finally getting around to him - the ending won't be happy....

my take on this whole megan meier thing...

ya'll knew it would only be a matter of time before i chimed in on this with my thoughts. since it's all over the news - pretty much daily now - and the back lash on both sides is about insane - this is what i think.

Two wrongs NEVER make a right. Never.

The Drews created the account to gain her trust and teach her a lesson. It was wrong. No matter why they thought she deserved it - whatever they thought she did or was doing to their daughter to deserve to be taught a lesson - it was wrong. Revenge is always wrong.

What the Meier's did with the fooseball table - the distruction of property - while done out of grief and anger and passion of the heat of the moment - was wrong.

Now people are targeting either family for different reasons. The "blog". The lists of the Drew's personal information. The calls for boycotts. The protests. The vandilizations of homes. The harrassment of innocent bystanders and business owners. It's all wrong. Not one bit is justifiable. Not one bit of it makes anything right.

A little girl lost her life. A family lost their daughter. Another family has lost their business and saftey. How is any of the backlash going to fix that? It won't.

The only thing left to do is to treat our children the meaning of the word respect. Teach them that each person in this world is infinately valuable. Teach them to turn the other cheek. Teach them that each person has emotions, beliefs, concerns, feelings. Teach them that everyone is different and it's those differences that make us unique and special. Teach them what a boring world the place would be if everyone looked the same, felt the same, believed the same, had the same opinions. Teach them that it's those differences that make the world wonderful. Teach them that two wrongs NEVER make a right.

Most importantly, teach them that they don't have to like or agree with a person, but they do have to show them respect. Everyone deserves respect - no matter what they may or may not have done.

go tigers!!!

even if i'm not a mizzou alum. i mean - it's not like fontbonne had a football team. so if i'm gonna fit in at the office with all the other college football fans - i have to have someone to root for...

giggle

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=9616331857

survey says?

i've added a new feature to my brain - to the right you will see a poll. this first one is lame. but i'm tanked up on cough meds right now - so i can't think of anything better...

so - survey says? what holiday decorations should i put up first?

i like gingerbread boys and girls...

yum.

more fun with neighbors...

so ya'll remember my insane weirdo neighbor who left the landscaping bricks in his front yard for 11 months until i called the city to report it??

well, two weeks ago, he had several panels of privacy fence delivered. they were placed in the back yard, lined up against the fence on one side of the yard like that was where they were going to be installed.

then they blew over and laid on the ground and up against the swing set for a few days. then they were picked up. then blown over again. now they are picked up again.

we're waiting to see how many months before they actually install the fence. we'll be happy when they do - it will block rolen's ability to see the dog he doesn't like...

roley poley update...

we took rolen back to the vet tonite and the dr. was very happy to see that rolen was doing much better. he actually admitted he was surprised to see him getting around so well. it's a night and day difference from where we were a week ago...

he's jumping on the couch better, moving around better, can stand to potty better, and is managing the stairs on the deck better. not better enough that we're moving his kennel back downstairs just yet. but better. he's eating and drinking like a pig which is largely because of the steroids. i took that steroid once for a spider bite and ate everything in sight. we went to the ball game where i out ate jeff by eating a foot long hotdog, hand rolled pretzel, large specialty nachos, ice cream, peanuts - and then looked at him and said i was still hungry.

he still can over do it pretty quickly and easily. but if we can get him to rest it helps. he's not as hyper as he usually is - i think he tires out quickly. but he's slowly returning to being his normal self.

the prognosis - while not officially given - appears to be really good. the vet refilled the antibiotics and steroids for another 10 days but reduced the dosages - antibiotics by half, steroids by 3/4 ths. we're still supposed to keep him still - but the more he heals - the harder that is. he thinks he's super dog. we're supposed to check back in 10 days.

this has changed our thanksgiving plans quite a bit. he's not well enough to go wrestle with his doggie foster brother for four days straight - we'd be right back where we started. so on thursday, jeff and i will drive to the campground to meet up with my parents, siblings, and nina for dinner and then jeff will come back home to take care of rolen while nina and i stay until saturday morning. this way i can keep up the friday morning shopping tradition.

so - that's all that.

gobble gobble!

for those who have been wonderin

i know i've been quiet - but it's been a crazy couple of weeks.

jeff spent last week in NOLA. i should have pictures to post in the next few days.

and once he returned, rolen got really sick. he was doing this strange thing for about two weeks where he would come in from outside and drink a bunch of water and then he would throw it up. dogs do strange things like that so we didn't think much of it. friday i noticed a slight limp in his hind legs. saturday he started stumbling going up the stairs and stuff.

we got the vet to squeeze him in on saturday. the vet said he had a fever and thought he might have been infected by a tick and put him on an antibiotic and steroid. he stopped eating on saturday and by sunday was getting worse. there was no strength in his back legs. he couldn't go up stairs at all and down wasn't easy either. we had to move his kennel into our very small living room - where it still is. he still wasn't eating or drinking.

we took him back to the vet monday - by then he couldn't stand to pee or poo and was walking kinda like a frog. it was step. step. step. sit. they sedated him and did xrays and blood work. (BTW - PRICEY!) the xrays showed no breaks. the blood work was normal. no infections. white and red blood counts normal (which means it may not have been a tick at all). organs all fuctioning normally. they shot him with an anti inflammatory and told us to keep him quiet and still. touch back in a few days to check on his progress. we've been babying him ever since.

we got him to start eating on monday nite - i got some of those packets of food with the meaty chunks and potatos and rice. he thinks those are a treat anyway. he also started drinking again and he can keep it all down now.

the last two days have shown some improvement. if he's still for awhile - he can use his back legs better. but he over does it and tires out very easily. going potty is still an ordeal.

i'll touch base with the vet again tomorrow on his progress. i think i'll ask for an oral anti inflammatory to get us through the weekend - just in case. i think the shot helped quite a bit.

so that's the last week in a nut-shell.

it's hard to be my goofy self with this stuff goin on...

on a high note - my table took 6th place in epiphany's trivia nite saturday. we rock and stuff....

woops!

i wonder if perhaps the performer just wore the wrong outfit. perhaps she reached into her closet for her gorilla suit and accidently grabbed the g string and pasties instead...

sign the colbert petition!

i did...

http://www.colbert2008.org/

halloween pet peeves

i know that halloween has been over for about 12 hours now. but there are a few things that annoy me and i have to get them off of my chest.

1. people who don't follow the rules.

the rules are fairly simple, right? porch light on - you go to the house to trick or treat. no light - no treats. simple. you don't go to the doors without lights on. you don't leave your light on if you aren't home or have no intention of opening the door. it's really not hard. and if you are having a block party and you are all gonna hang out at one house with your bowls of candy - don't leave the lights on at your houses anyway...

2. i don't like propaganda with my candy.

i don't care what good cause you are a part of. i don't want peta stickers. coupons and information for body works at the science center. cereal baseball card prizes that you also gave us the past 3 years in a row. just fork over the kit kats and leave the rest to bumper stickers.

3. kids want junk.

while it's nice to think of the health of the kids and all, but most normal children don't eat sunflower seeds. air popped popcorn isn't usually good either. and don't even get us started on raisins.

4. make my kid work for her treat.

ask her about her joke. at least try to figure out what her costume is or acknowledge it. i spent a lot of time in good will for crying out loud!!!

you get the beeeeesssttt of both worlds....

happy halloween from hannah (and her entourage)...

i'm outraged...

i can't even begin to figure out how to break this to nina...

and for those out there saying she was a cheater because she was a dancer. she's not a dancer. she's a performer. singer. actress. you know - kinda like mel b? if sabrina was cheating - so was mel. and jane for that matter - she's admitted to dancing traning in her younger days...

i wanna be that kid...

so i was home sick yesterday with a nasty cold (no - i'm not better -just better than yesterday - thanks for askin'). i got myself all involved in the "Top Ten Most Blingiest My Super Sweet Sixteen Episodes" countdown.

i know i shouldn't watch these shows. but i can't help it. it's like a car accident. you know you shouldn't look. you don't even really want to look. and your totally ashamed about it because you look anyway - and then you kinda wished you didn't.

anyway. blingiest epsiode number one was totally insane. the kid was the son of l.a. reid and pebbles of hip hop/rap fame. and he just moved to new york and started a new school and basically was throwing this party to show off and make friends and stuff in my opinion. i think he had talked himself up so much that some of the kids really thought he was full of it.

anyway - before i give you the total cost of his party. here's a brief summary.

the invitations were custom made mp3 players with a file of his voice giving the party information. he invited pretty much everyone at the school. so like 400 mp3 players.

the party was held in jay z's club in new york - it was closed down for this part.

puff daddy showed up because he is this kid's god father.

they rented a mega expensive rolls royce at like $4000 an hour for his grand enterance which no one saw because they were all in the club.

they had rap video girl dancers hired to dance in the club.

and kanye west performed.

the overall cost of the party was $1.5 million. the kanye performance alone was $1 million.

now if that doesn't buy him a few untrue friends - nothing will.

in the meantime - i so wish i could go blow $4500 an hour on a car that i sit in for two minutes...

totally random thoughts...

• can they REALLY continue calling the show "prision break" if they've already accomplished the breaking out of prision part of the plot? i mean - wouldn't it be more approrpriate to call it "life on the lam" or something?
• how is it my cat can be asleep on my lap on the couch and suddenly just KNOW that there is a possum walking through our yard that could be seen from the window causing her to go nuts?
• if google weren't called google - what would it be called??
• do you think that guy on "dirty jobs" can expense his water bill due to the extensive showers he has to take after each episode?
• i wonder if mel b had a hard time fighting the urge to sing along with the band monday night when she and her partner danced to "spice up your life". even more - i wonder if she was cursing under her breath because the band did it badly...
• i'm highly disappointed in the new pinapple runt flavor. and the mango isn't great either. and i love mangos...

i got to sit in the dugout and you didn't!

i'm probably violating some copyright thing at the moment because this was taken by one of our event photographers. but when we went on the busch stadium tour as part of our reunion event a couple weeks ago - i got to sit in the dugout and stand on the field - but not on the grass - and sit on mike shannon's yoga ball (not as kinky as it sounds - i promise)...

blech...

so a week or so ago my doctor increased one of my medications from twice a day to three times a day.

the drug has side effects that play with appitite.

and ever since i started increasing the medication - i totally lack an appetite. i'm not hungry. the thought of food makes me nausiated. i have to force myself to eat 85% of the time.

it kinda sucks....

except for the part where the scale told me i was 5 pounds lighter this morning. that part wasn't so bad...

news flash

there are currently - as of 11:55 this morning - central time - people camped out in front of the fox theater on grand - waiting to buy......


clay aiken tickets. they go on sale tomorrow.

um...

is anyone out there???

solicitation...

i am soliciting donations toward a fund so that i can buy a laptop.

see - i have this short story floating around in my head. i haven't written one in so long - part of me isn't sure i know how to do it anymore. (what's the subject and where do i put the predicate again? and is it mandatory to use the word "nipple" - i seem to remember something from the college paper about that...) a few people ragged on my writing a few years ago. some people say they believe in me. others i don't think mean it. actions speak louder.

but darnit all to poopyville - there's something in my head and if i don't get it out - i'm going to go insane. or drown. because i always seem to think about it in the shower. and the thoughts just keep going and going and i have no where to put them and then by tomorrow they are gone and i have to start all over again.

and i don't seem to have a computer around when i have time to actually write it. like in the shower. not that a laptop would help me in the shower. but you get the point.

and i can't do it the old fashioned way. my hand gets crampy writing my to do list.

so i need a laptop. who wants to help me? who wants to see the story floating in my head?? come on. who wants to see? who wants to be first???

i'm tellin ya. i could be the next j.k. rowlings. cept - what's in my head is so totally not fantasy...

gripes and grins...

GRIPES

• i haven't received child support since august. and the last bit before that was may. children can't live on $50 every six months.
• no matter how hard i try - i can't seem to make everyone happy.
• i really wish i could do part time work for full time pay.
• i know there's something i'm meant to do with my life - i just can't seem to find it.
• i don't have enough hours in the day. to sleep. to work. to play.
• i'm always tired and i sometimes feel like a bad mom and wife.

GRINS

• i have some good friends who have stood by me through anything.
• my best friend will happily take a 15 minute phone call from me where i do nothing but bitch and never mentions that i forgot to ask her anything about her day before i have to hang up.
• i have food in my belly, a roof over my head, and a thick comforter on my bed and people to share it all with.
• i have homemade chocolate chip ice cream hardening in my freezer - courtesy of my new ice cream maker (4 years is the appliance anniversary)
• i have a purring kitty in my lap who will continue to love me unconditionally as long as i continue to give her food.
• i have a husband, daughter, and family who all love me - even when the laundry isn't done, the sink is full of dishes, and i only have energy to serve hot dogs and mac and cheese for dinner.

stress...

how come i wasn't interviewed for this?

crazy dentistry...

and people wonder why i'm so afraid to go to the dentist...

r.i.p.

i would like to share a moment of silence in the memory of lisa moore, beloved wife of les moore, mother of summer moore and darin fairgood, lawyer, breast cancer activist, friend. she passed on the morning of october 4, 2007 with the printing of the morning paper. her courage, humor, good heart, and wit will be missed by readers everywhere...

and let us not comment on how lame i am to mourn a comic strip character. i'm already well aware of that...