this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

this is karen seacrest coming to you - a little late due to hectic girl scout duties. you know - there's probably a seacrest joke there that simon would make - but i won't go there.

so since i'm about three days late with this - let's get onto it.

taking a ride on the "bye-bye" train this week was luke menard. luke - you won't be my next american idol because last week you slaughtered my favorite queen song. and you do these strange little poses when you sing that just scream "i'm an a'capella performer." i can't quite explain it. but it annoys me. and it doesn't go with the songs you sing. and you kinda remind me of luke perry - and he's so 1994...

also taking the limo ride home (but hopefully wearing underwear) is kady malloy. kady - you won't be my next american idol because hello? been there. done that. and look at the outcome. britney's a nutcase who's daddy is controling her finances, who's ex is supervising the kids, and who's baby sister has decided it was cool to be a poor example for young girls everywhere. do we really need to go through that AGAIN? perhaps you could give that "legands in concert" show a try. they have performances in both branson AND las vegas...

leaving us also is asia'h epperson. now karen seacrest doesn't agree with this coice either. especially since it means once again that amanda didn't go home. but asia'h - you won't be my next american idol because america seems to think that amanda deserves it more than you. isn't that sad??

and on an expecially sad note - we are saying good-bye to mr. sassy pants himself - danny noriega. i've taken a bit of grief in recent weeks because i liked sassy pants. sure - he was a diva. and a drama queen. and an attention whore. but he just reminds me of justin on ugly betty so much! and i love justin on ugly betty! but anyway - sassy pants - you won't be my next american idol because i find it freakish for a boy to have such a tiny hiney. it's weird.

so there you have it. the "oh so close but not quite close enough" final four rejects of the first half of live episodes.

on to the top twelve!

this is karen seacrest saying - it's time for a thin mint binge. out.