book review - following foo

as of last night i finished reading following foo. i have a list 3 people long right now of those who want to read it next.

over all - it was a really good book. see, bd wong, an actor who you may know best from oz, law and order svu, or the father of the bride movies, is a gay man. he was in a committed relationship for many years when their biological clocks started ticking and they decided that all the talk over the years about some day having a family wasn't going to happen on it's own. so they set out to figure out who to go about becoming dads.

they found an organization that helps same sex couples - usually men - become dads. using richie's sisters eggs and bd's "forensic evidence" (as he referred to it when i heard him speak), and a surrogate mother - their journey began. to their joy they found they were expecting - not only one baby - but identical twins!

everything was going swimmingly until the babies started showing signs of distress and the surrogate gave birth three months early. turns out that the babies had some sort of condition that happens with twins where one of them kinda transfused most of his blood to the other so that the other would stand a better chance of survival. this is far better explained in the book by the way.

the first twin didn't make it. but the second twin was a fighter.

following the birth of the boys, bd wong started emailing family and friends to update them on the situation and the ups and downs and highs and lows that occure in the rollar coaster of a life that is lived inside the nicu. over the three months that little jackson foo wong was laying in the hospital nicu in san fransico, his father wrote. and what he wrote got forwarded and forwarded and forwarded. till tons of people he didn't know where silently cheering on his little boy. and tons of people were shooting back messages of encouragement. and through all of this writing and updating and using his words to deal with his situation - the basis for a book was formed.

i was wanted to read this book after hearing bd wong speak a couple months back. it sounded interesting. nina was premature and lived in nicu for a week. so i could relate in a way. i'm a bd wong fan - so that was another insentive. but it really gave me an insight into this man's life during this time. i mean - you think about actors living the glory life and relaxing the days away not really worrying about anything but their fancy cars and which party they can not wear underpants to and if donald trump is trashing them on page six again. but you don't think about them staying in a branson style motel in modesto or driving to and from different movie sets or eating at the hole in the wall chinese place or just hanging out in a hospital like a normal person for weeks on end. i mean - with the exception of the occasional name drop or movie set mention or whatever - he was totally normal. sure - we don't all get personal emails from michelle kwan - but whatever...

and then there was the way you watched him discover how to be a dad and how he would talk about his son. there was just such love. it's amazing.

anyway - i enjoyed the book. pretty good. not a best seller or a book many have probably heard of. but i'd totally recommend it (unless your pretty conservative and have issues with the gay thing. it's not shoved down your throat or anything - but they are a gay couple and you just can't leave that out of the story).

up next - on "what is karen reading?" - Marie Antionette: The Journey by Antonia Fraiser. one chapter in and the historical who's related to who stuff made me really tired...