welcome to a very special episode of "why you won't be my next american idol". i'm your very smart, talented, clairvoyant karen seacrest. i apologize for not getting this to you sooner - but i was celebrating the night away because i - for once - ACCURATELY PICKED DAVID COOK AS THE WINNER!!! yeah me!
honestly - i don't know what everyone is so suprised about. it seemed like a no brainer to me.
so - let's not beat around the bush. david archuletta - you won't be my next american idol for the following reasons:
1. you have no range. you can only sing the powerful ballads that people sing on telethons. every song you sing sounds exactly the same.
2. you may be young - but you are by no means hip or marketable.
3. your daddy spent too much time training you on stage presence - and not enough time training you to have a personality.
4. and because lindsey's husband is right and you do sound like vera di milo (performed by jim carrey on in living color) when you talk - and it's freaky!!!
and that means that DAVID COOK - YOU ARE MY NEXT AMERICAN IDOL! and nina already wants your first cd. so that's one cd sold...
and your from missouri - so that's a bonus. i will have to work on you being a royals fan though....
until next year - this is karen seacrest - out...
Easter
11 years ago
2 comments:
Congrats on picking the winner! You are so intuitive.
Did you know DC is dating Kimberly Caldwell from Season 2? Saw that on TMZ ...
Kristine
jeff is jealous of DC and KC's new found love. he has the hots for caldwell...
still trying to get price information on nkotb tickets. stltoday is saying $29-$69 (i think) but i've yet to see the ticket prices announced on scottrade's or ticketmaster's webpage. or nkotb's webpage. it's driving me nuts!
but if that's the range - i'm shooting for midrange. i don't want to sit in nosebleed now that i'm old enough to control buying my own tickets. i sat in nosebleed at busch and the arena in 89...
Post a Comment