this week on "why you won't be my next american idol"...

this week on "why you won't be my next american idol" we celebrate bucky covington. bucky - you won't be my next american idol because - now i don't wanna sound snobbish, or get sued for libel, or anything so don't go taking this the wrong way - but (in a whispered tone) you kinda look like the type of guy that i wouldn't wanna leave my child alone with - if you know what i mean. not saying you are a icky type person like that - but i can't take too many chances...

that said - what was up with the eye makeup this week? seemed a bit heavy to me. but i'd love it if they could teach me to line my upper lids they way the lined the lower lids of chris's eyes on tuesday nite...

what will happen next week? will ace break out into an upbeat number and kill it again? will kellie wink at the camera a minimum of 10 times while singing? will elliott show up in goat horns? will we see a sign that's more original than "marry me ace!" "pick pickler" or "i've got the mcfeever"? will the group commercial actually not frighten small children??

find out all this and more on your next episode of "why you won't be my next american idol"...

until then - karen. out.